Kweeny Todd: September 2013

Sunday 29 September 2013

October Is Almost Here...

I need to do some Halloween decorating. I think it's time to do a little conjuring...wanna help me out Lydia?

Though I know I should be wary,

Still I venture someplace scary;

Ghostly haunting I turn loose ...

Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice!

*Looks around at her new surroundings and smirks*

This will do nicely.

(Special thanks to Frank Browning for conjuring up my new banner. )

Monday 23 September 2013

IT'S SHOWTIME...

Halloween is fast approaching, and if you've read my blog at all you know it's my favorite holiday of all. I celebrate all October, and this year, I got my costume idea all planned out...

Are you guys ready for this? Not only am I going to be a judge for this years HALLOWEEN HORROR MOVIE MADNESS (and the theme this year is a banger! VIDEO NASTIES!) But I am going to bring chills, thrills and gooey spills as the Ghost With the Most! So you better bring your butts back over here to Kweeny Todd and witness as the Madness takes it's toll! I'll eat anything you want me to eat. I'll swallow anything you want me to swallow. But, come on down and I'll... chew on a dog! Arroooo!

So go ahead, make my millennium!

Wednesday 11 September 2013

RED HANDED CONTEST WINNER

In case you weren't paying attention, my friend Holly from Holly's Horrorland and I ran a contest to help promote the small short indie film I am making called Red Handed:

Feel free to check out the Facebook page for more info on the short film! And since our contest has come to an end (And I thank all of you who participated and checked out the film page) I have a winning story to share with you! David Rhoads will be getting a lovely prize from Holly, and be plastered on the internet! Or at least on my blog. *smirk*

Enjoy David!

And do take a picture of the fancy thing you purchase at http://sideshowbythesea.com!

Nostalgia

by David Rhoads

Well, that's it, my arm's off. What was surprising about this thought was its detachment, no pun intended. Unless the blast cauterized it as well, blood loss should be the end of me in just a minute or two. Less if the shock kills me first. And judging from how clinically I am analyzing this situation, I'd say shock is a safe bet at this point. There was an almost comforting familiarity to the numb sensation, hearkening back to prior, presumably somewhat less fatal traumas.

Two minutes isn't a whole lot of time. What should I do? Pray? What a joke. If God had gone to all the trouble of arranging an explosion in the High-Energy Physics lab, the pathetic mewling of one of His wayward creations wasn't going to derail His ineffable plan. Call my loved ones? A noble sentiment. There's my phone, right over there. You'll notice it's very conveniently attached to my hand, as a few seconds ago (really? just a few seconds?) I had been using it to record the momentous occasion. Too bad said hand is no longer conveniently attached to its customary limb of choice, or any other limb for that matter. Crossing the room to go get it isn't much of an option either; lying on the floor staring at the burbling fountain of blood where my shoulder used to be is about all that can be managed without the kind of pain that causes blackouts. What other brilliant plans have you got, brain? Analyze recent failures so as to avoid repeating them in the future? This is by far the worst idea in the history of human consciousness. Wait, no, the worst idea in the history of human consciousness was the inability of human consciousness to stop itself spinning around and around on ideas which it would really do better to avoid. Endlessly repeating loops of futile rumination, constantly bringing up the past as though it could be changed.

If I hadn't come in to work today... Ridiculous. This was the day of the Big Triumph. The biggest step forward in understanding the way the world worked since someone worked out that fire could live in your house in a pile of sticks. If everything went right then we would have a handle on the big T, once and for all. No way was I missing this, not for anything in the world. If I had been more careful... It was safe! It had to be, every great mind in the field checked over it a hundred times! No way would we even turn it on if it hadn't already been proven safe. Just then the burbling fountain switched back to spurting for almost a full second, wracking me with pain as the pressure caused me to momentarily jerk off the ground involuntarily; as if to emphasize just how safe the tech had turned out to be. If I had it to do over again... What? What could I possibly do differently? Even if every possible quantum outcome showed itself, there just isn't enough prior knowledge of how things would turn out. Every equation that led into the creation of this new technology says it plain as day: Information can't go backwards. For the same reason the speed of light is an absolute barrier to movement, we can't send any sort of signal into the past, which means that the ability to “rewind”, as some waggish author put it, was fundamentally limited. It's theoretically possible to get a different outcome because of quantum interactions we don't fully understand, but there's no way to “send someone back” with foreknowledge. No sending the winning lottery numbers to your younger self. No “going back and killing Hitler”.

I'm going to die, and it hurts, oh God why does it hurt so much? Ah, the blessed numbness of shock is already wearing off... I suppose I rather thoroughly abused the privilege. But even this surge of pain, rushing into my attention like a surge of my blood onto the floor, feels oddly familiar, if not in the slightest bit comforting. But that can't be right. I know, deep down into my bones, this is the end pain. This is the pain of a body that has been torn apart and will soon cease to function. No way have I ever felt like this before and not died from it. God I am so scared why does this have to happen to me why can't something else happen anything else at all oh God just get me out of here... This train of thought probably would have continued on to the very end, but for the compound PA crackling to life, full of distortion brought on by the who-knows-what kind of radiation we've saturated the surroundings with at this point.

“Attention all personnel.” Voice so distorted it could be any of the senior staff, or for that matter anyone who found their way into the control room, “The distortion is in the process of expanding geometrically. If it continues at its current rate of acceleration, in less than nine minutes planet Earth will literally be warped until it breaks into pieces. Because of this...” and here the voice chokes a sob for just a moment, giving me the moment I need to realize what is about to be said, “...activated the rewind. Unfortunately we have only enough power to go back 90 seconds. It is theoretically impossible to bring any knowledge of the future with us, but our only hope lies in somehow ceasing the experiment before the explosion. Good luck, all of you.”

In the distance, the whine of capacitors building to the sort of discharge that can tear time apart. Lying here, as the last of my blood is pumped out by a heart that just doesn't know any better, all I can think is how achingly familiar all of these sensations are.

Tuesday 10 September 2013

It's Time! BOOK TOUR!

My dear friend Jeremy Hawkins is taking over my blog today for his awesome BOOK TOUR! Read on and all will be revealed dear readers! And don't forget to check out his books!

~Kweeny

Celebrity Story – Angus Scrimm

Running late to this “Weekend of Horrors (1993)” convention knowing there were a handful of great horror film celebrities waiting for our show to arrive. We ran into this converted hockey rink looking for the contact we had made, making our apologies and hearty greet we were on the move. I think I had a second before I was to my first celebrity star of “Tallman, Phantasm” series Angus Scrimm. Over the years fans have come to love him for his gentle and kind manner, he was no different with me. Setting the greets we started the interview I had my questions in hand and lump in my throat, I asked… Angus answered.

Interview went on for about 10 minutes when I knew we had 5, that is showbiz I guess and we were right thick of our chat. I like to call them chats really, because I never like to feel like we were different. Angus was is and shall always be a cool man, now I am sure you are wondering if somehow this went bad or I made some rude comment. Nope not this time, only problem when we got done and said farewells I realized I was still wearing my stupid jacket. Since this wasn’t about me, it was not a problem… just looked really silly and it showed.

Look at next your date calendar people, it might give you a hint to who the next encounter I may have had on my tour. So thank you to Queenie for letting me share my story and to you all for being here. Please follow the tour and maybe I can interest you in entering the giveaway, come you know you want to.

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ABOUT THE BOOK:

It's a four book series 40 pages each and it is the art/design from things I had designed over the years. It's a mish-mash of things that I had seen in my head... and some are future designs that will become shirts. Places I wanted to go artistically as you travel from where I was to where I am now. Is it great journey! Titles came from the idea of time "12:34, 35, 36 and 37” seems that is when my best ideas came to me... day or night. It's funny I never considered myself a "writer" just a man who likes to paint a canvas if it be words or my art/design.

Art from Jeremy's books

Giveaways: Some great prizes being given away please stop over at my main page “BEING RETRO” and look just below the header for the “It’s Time” Tour Giveaway link and enter today.

Thank You, for letting me play host and to all who took the “time” to read this… you are all the best.

Jeremy Hawkins

Being Retro

beingretro.com